my friend shared this commercial on her fbk page and it brought tears to my eyes...I'm raising my daughter to BE A GIRL but all I do seems so different than what other mothers are doing, I kept doing it anyway because I trust my 4 years studying Elementary Education and the extra year i spent working on my diploma, I trust my psychology professors, books, papers, research and I trust sociology experts who emphasize words of wisdom for moms raising daughters...
it's a daily, sometimes hourly question i ask myself: "am i doing it right?" i don't want my daughter to be like me, i want her to become a far better woman than i am, this means hard work for me and it didn't start at her birth, not even during pregnancy, it all started when i said YES to my love, when i chose a father for her, one that would walk with me along the journey of raising a boy who loves and respects females before he even had a sister, and to raise my daughter in a way that honors God who created her on HIS image just like her brother, her father, and myself...
it's interesting that this video features females who live in the West, where there's supposed to be equality and freedom, yet they struggle with their identity and self esteem as girls. Here in the MENA region people who immigrate voice one of their top concerns which is about raising their kids, SPECIALLY their daughters in the West, they'd rather raise them up here where it's more "safe" then take them there for a better future. i see that it's way more difficult to raise kids SPECIALLY daughters here, because I'm currently swimming against the current, and the current is strong because of a resilient thick rope that keeps pulling me back, its main components are forces of social norms, religion, tradition, man's superiority and dominion, plus concepts like "shame", "inappropriate", "unacceptable"... etc. All of these forces are entangled in that rope as they conspire together to make sure girls are tied up and well kept and "preserved" like pickled veggies inside a transparent jar, for us to look at and enjoy them occasionally opening up the jar when we need a "piece"...
the issue of women's rights and gender equality are hot topics in the MENA region and hot topics in our household too, yet i try to make as little fuss as possible about it and go through the motions pretending it's not even there for fear that i'll be exaggerating or over emphasizing it to the extent of being repulsive, so i keep reminding myself to do simple yet powerful things, to say little yet gigantic words... just like this video did
so now I know that not only what I've been doing for the past 3 years (actually 10 years) was right but it also has a name: I'm "REwriting the rules" and that's SO hard, but it's worth it... and this does not exclude my son who helps a lot without knowing it at the age of 5, but we all work together. even if i feel that it's double the work for me i still pray that both my boy and my girl will grow up saying "I would run like myself" I will LIVE like myself... my BEST self
photo cultine: i took this photo this very morning when i noticed that my son was extra nice to his sister as they walked upstairs and into their nursery/summer school. i'm glad i had my camera to document this moment which drew a smile on my face as i drove back home praying that they'll be BFF's, side by side, going through the journey of life hand in hand because they are equally loved and equally cherished by God and us, their parents...
it's a daily, sometimes hourly question i ask myself: "am i doing it right?" i don't want my daughter to be like me, i want her to become a far better woman than i am, this means hard work for me and it didn't start at her birth, not even during pregnancy, it all started when i said YES to my love, when i chose a father for her, one that would walk with me along the journey of raising a boy who loves and respects females before he even had a sister, and to raise my daughter in a way that honors God who created her on HIS image just like her brother, her father, and myself...
it's interesting that this video features females who live in the West, where there's supposed to be equality and freedom, yet they struggle with their identity and self esteem as girls. Here in the MENA region people who immigrate voice one of their top concerns which is about raising their kids, SPECIALLY their daughters in the West, they'd rather raise them up here where it's more "safe" then take them there for a better future. i see that it's way more difficult to raise kids SPECIALLY daughters here, because I'm currently swimming against the current, and the current is strong because of a resilient thick rope that keeps pulling me back, its main components are forces of social norms, religion, tradition, man's superiority and dominion, plus concepts like "shame", "inappropriate", "unacceptable"... etc. All of these forces are entangled in that rope as they conspire together to make sure girls are tied up and well kept and "preserved" like pickled veggies inside a transparent jar, for us to look at and enjoy them occasionally opening up the jar when we need a "piece"...
the issue of women's rights and gender equality are hot topics in the MENA region and hot topics in our household too, yet i try to make as little fuss as possible about it and go through the motions pretending it's not even there for fear that i'll be exaggerating or over emphasizing it to the extent of being repulsive, so i keep reminding myself to do simple yet powerful things, to say little yet gigantic words... just like this video did
so now I know that not only what I've been doing for the past 3 years (actually 10 years) was right but it also has a name: I'm "REwriting the rules" and that's SO hard, but it's worth it... and this does not exclude my son who helps a lot without knowing it at the age of 5, but we all work together. even if i feel that it's double the work for me i still pray that both my boy and my girl will grow up saying "I would run like myself" I will LIVE like myself... my BEST self
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